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If people have extramarital affairs then why do they get married?
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There must be something that they are getting from the extra marital affair that they don't get from their partners. Most times it could be sex, money, or just mere seeking for fantasy.
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Other times the love isn't there anymore and instead of trying to fix it and rekindle old flames, they go outside to please themselves. 
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Some people are actually just never satisfied with their marriage in general and it makes them to sleep around and cheat.

29 Answers

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Why do people get married? They get married because they feel they are meant for each other. That's the reason everybody has, but I think people marry so that they are not alone, or for companionship, others for security, others for convenience, others for material purposes, others for status, others marry so that they can fulfil their sexual desires, others marry so that they cannot be ridiculed by the society, others marry for babies. So as you can see there are many reasons why people get married and are sure there are many more this is just but to mention a few. When people are about to tie the note they are usually asked to go for marriage counselling which is usually for their own good but people ignore this exercise because they feel they don't need it. That is why marriages are falling apart with people getting into extramarital affairs hoping to get what they are not getting from their spouses. Marrying for the wrong reasons is what is bringing about infidelity in marriages. When you know why you are getting married, extramarital affairs won't be a conversation you will have to hold in your family because there will be no reason for you to go out. 
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I agree with your answer. While seeing this question, I am also have a same thought in my mind. Your answer is good and clear my doubts. Thanks. 
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I like your Answer very much. It's useful for everyone. Thanks for give your opinion. Thanks a lot.
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I like your lunch you very much it's useful for everyone thanks for give your opinion thanks a lot
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This answer has been so comprehensive and has covered almost everything as to why people do get married. Thanks alot I appreciate. 
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I think sometimes it just doesn't work out the way they think it will. Dating someone and spending every day with them are quite separate things which is why some people choose to live together before committing to marriage. At least if it doesn't work out it doesn't end in a messy divorce.

I think some people miss the excitement of being able to date other people when they get married. They feel it is very final and long for the days when they could please themselves when they weren't tied to the routine of a domestic life. Maybe they got married too young, perhaps because the woman was pregnant, and feel they have missed out on dating other people.

Or maybe they just weren't right for each other in the first place but carried on with the wedding because everything had been arranged and they were too afraid to cancel the arrangements. It's sad but it happens and one or both partners later find a more suitable partner.
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I like your answer very much it's very useful for everyone thanks for give your opinion thanks a lot
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They get married because of love, people do extramarital affairs because of temptation. It's hard to be in a situation where you're tempted and got nothing to do with it. 
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But if you really love someone, you won't let yourself be tempted
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You are correct. They fall into temptations and become ashamed.

They do things they never planned to do.
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There are different reasons people get married. It is not the conventional love story and companionship for everyone. People get married for money, security, escape, freedom, lust, desire, love etc

Most times when people cheat, they are looking for something that isn't in their partners. Something they love and need. There's really no excuse for cheating though but that's the way it is. 

Marrying for the wrong reasons. Other times It is bliss and the beginning and something goes wrong. The couple aren't smart enough to work through it and cheating sets in. 
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Many times when this happens it is because they have an arranged marriage and they need to get married. There are some guys that just don't want to be married and have many affairs and just don't want to settle down. But in some cases, they are forced to by the family because this is their religion or just how it works. They accept the arrange and get married, but in their mind, heart, and soul, they just can be happy with one woman so they have affairs during the marriage.

While other men will fall in love with a woman and want to get married. They want to settle down, but it is hard on them. At first, they don't have an affair, but in the back of their minds, they keep thinking about it. Then one day it just happens. The cycle starts again and they can't stop it. They enjoy and love their wife, but they feel a need to be with other women. 
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This is a million dollars question, I usually ponder on this question because my own blood, my dear cousin cheats on the wife daily and you wonder what is going on in the world.

I solely attribute it to greed they just want to eat their cake and still have it back, married but still behaving the same way when they were single no decorum no sense of responsibility.

The people in this category have an insatiable urge and they go get whatever it is the reason for their extra affairs. Some go for material gains, some for sex and some just for the fun of it.

They forget the trauma the other person will go through because they are selfish and self-centred and wouldn't even mind ruining the marriage.
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Being with one person everyday, every month, every year is very boring. People especially men need change to reduce monotony possibly. Marrying other person will lead to issues and mostly increased budget and etceteras. Men love their wives because they belong to them permanently unlike other women who just need benefits/ favours which most of the times is cash. Besides, a good number of men don't love marrying second wives because they might end up destroying their marriage with their first wives.

Also, some women are just stubborn and its always their joy causing scandals in marriages. They'll do everything to seduce the men into having some relationship with them. As a woman, its good to play cool as long as you don't see all the stuff happening.
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This is a very important question that every yet to marry youths is suppose to ask by conscience and debate on in reality. Marriage is actually supposed to be a binding union between two people in body, flesh and soul but today many couples defy their marital vows and I start to wonder why.


The answer is so simple, some of the reason is due to lack of sincere courtship. Many couples couldn't live in each other's reality while courting and they both decided to go by the way if pretence just to promote what they define as peace. And after marriage, the reality starts to ask questions and all they could do is to find solace outside.

Another reason is due to carelessness, many couples after marriage do not longer care about each other's feelings and start to neglect responsibility and many more. Some women will even start to wear old and shabby dresses just because they are married.

Also importantly, compatibility is a very important factor two people usually take for granted, a short man who desires tall and black woman as spouse and also a tall lady who desired a tall man as spouse and then decides to pick opposite just for unreasonable reason might only take grace if God not to cheat.

I don't want to go into forcing factor of choice in Africa. However, it takes only the grace of God to be faithful.
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There are series of reasons that leads both married men and women to engage in extra marital affairs. In my opinion they are :

Lack of compatibility,  there are some couples who do not really engaged in courtship relationship at least to know few basic things about them selves until they get married, if they find it difficult to manage there differences they sort the problem by engaging on extra marital effairs..

Religion restrictions,  there some people both men and women that requires much of sexual intimacy especially men,  in a situation where a woman can not satisfied his partner or does not posses the much energy or strength needed to satisfy him on bed and his religion does not permit him to marry more one wife then he opt for extra marital affairs.
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Marriage is supposed to be something taken very seriously by anyone who took the decision to get married and settle down with his or her life partner but with it's not what we witness now with how most married people treat their marriage vows. It's like the ones that are married are more into the act of having extra curricula affair out of wedlock and I keep asking myself why they would choose such kind of lifestyle when they are married.


I believe that nobody is under a must to get married, although some parents are guilty of this act by forcing their children to marry when they are not ready and also to who they are not in love with. More than 80 percent of married people who cheat on their partner do so as a result of not being in love with whom they are married to.
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It may be because they didn't want to get married in the first place but they had to because of their parents and other family issues or things like that. Or may be they were already having affair with a person and forcefully got married to another person because of the same reasons. There can be many things. And sometimes, it is merely because the person is playing and is not loyal and married for a showoff.
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If people have the extra marital affairs and get married because they don't want that their affairs get revealed and they will have the social acceptance as well.
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Extra marital affairs are acts of : adultery, deception, have no regard for fellow human beings but themselves, and are devoid of understanding of what is right from wrong based on the righteous Perfect Law (Commandments of God).

Many individuals and most especially children suffer. 
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Very true. These affairs bring so much pain especially to the children and nowadays we witness couples killing thier spouses and committing suicide. Others go an extra mile and kill even thier children. 
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There is lot of reasons for having extra marital affairs. The main reason is money and sex. When they don't find love, they do cheat. Some men, do it as a hobby which is wrong obviously. 
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Some men cannot control themselves on finding another woman in their lives. It is not a good thing though. Once you married to someone, it should be forever. It sounds ideal, right? 
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Yes they need to be contented with what they thought and felt it was good for them. That is, thier chosen married wives. Other women out there belong to other men. 
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The worst thing is that some people start their affair having to spend a long happy life with their wife and have children, but after some year loses interest in their partner and find them unattractive.
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Love forgives and love heals, and no one is perfect. We are here on earth to become better individuals. So when people make mistakes you give them the opportunity to make amends and improve on it, you don't condemn totally that is why people still get married despite the past. 
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They get married because there is something that they need to that person. Commonly are money, sex, wealth and etc. and after they get that, they now walk away from you.
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A very bad intention and selfish act. I don't think it's good to be doing such. Not recommended at all. 
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If a person just runs after sex, then he must not be considered as human, they should be considered as animals, without any social values.
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With the modern society, so much values have been left and people have gone extra miles to disrespect the marriage institution. This has been contributed by greed, peer pressure, disrespect to thier marriage partners among other factors. 
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So true, nowadays, believe that being modern means not following old social values, which is absolutely wrong.
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If a person continues to have an extramarital affair even after marriage he is definitely a womanizer, in rare cases, the reason behind it can be forced to arrange or having a lack of understanding in a relationship. But I believe whatever is the reason one should never cheat in a relationship, marriage is a beautiful bond and having such things not only destroy this beautiful bond but also destroy an individual's life.
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People engage in such situation because of what they are facing, if they don't get the satisfaction they need they can go outside to get it.
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