It is a noble idea. But is it wise for a person to adopt at such a state?
person
brightness_auto
11 Answers
I don't know the details about the child and the adopter. Did she have a job at the time that's why she adopted the child and can support herself and the baby?
Why is she jobless now? Is it because of covid lockdown? I wonder what would happen if the child continued to stay with the parents (who were willing to give up the child) during pandemic and joblessness? Would they, the parents, be better off caring for the child instead?
So many to consider. I can't be legalistic about these things when it comes to the child's life and well-being.
I think, it's a hard call and challenge the adopting new-parent will have to make on her own.
Why is she jobless now? Is it because of covid lockdown? I wonder what would happen if the child continued to stay with the parents (who were willing to give up the child) during pandemic and joblessness? Would they, the parents, be better off caring for the child instead?
So many to consider. I can't be legalistic about these things when it comes to the child's life and well-being.
I think, it's a hard call and challenge the adopting new-parent will have to make on her own.
You are right, so many to consider. If the child's life and well-being are to be considered most, then the situation of the adopter is very crucial in making sure the objectives are precisely met. But I have made myself clear to them I will not meddle anymore.
The adoption was initially offered to the older sibling who was more eligible to adopt the toddler. However, her husband and son did not agree, which puzzled me the most as to why the adoption ended up to the non-eligible.
I really am not against the adoption thing. It's just how the adoption is done I am not condoning to. Prior to the adoption, I've suggested right from the start that they go through the process with the legit agencies to avoid encountering problems in the future. But to my surprise, they still went ahead with it underground anyways.
The non-eligible adopter was jobless for almost 20 years now. She is not quite physically fit and still living with her mother. But she and the other two older siblings planned to move her out to a rented house to be independent and committed to helping her as well financially.
Here went another problem after then - the lockdown, and the sudden passing of the husband of the eligible older sibling. All these problems were not expected. And now, they are all financially challenged.
The adoption was initially offered to the older sibling who was more eligible to adopt the toddler. However, her husband and son did not agree, which puzzled me the most as to why the adoption ended up to the non-eligible.
I really am not against the adoption thing. It's just how the adoption is done I am not condoning to. Prior to the adoption, I've suggested right from the start that they go through the process with the legit agencies to avoid encountering problems in the future. But to my surprise, they still went ahead with it underground anyways.
The non-eligible adopter was jobless for almost 20 years now. She is not quite physically fit and still living with her mother. But she and the other two older siblings planned to move her out to a rented house to be independent and committed to helping her as well financially.
Here went another problem after then - the lockdown, and the sudden passing of the husband of the eligible older sibling. All these problems were not expected. And now, they are all financially challenged.
The single new-parent adopter, how has she been supporting herself since the '20 years of unemployment?' What is she living on?
I'm sure she must be working somehow getting paid enough for herself?
Would the previous two-parent situation (probably have more kids) be the better parents for the child right now during this pandemic crisis? Or who was looking after and caring for the child before the adoption was taking place-- before the pandemic lockdown has wrecked many lives?
I'm sure she must be working somehow getting paid enough for herself?
Would the previous two-parent situation (probably have more kids) be the better parents for the child right now during this pandemic crisis? Or who was looking after and caring for the child before the adoption was taking place-- before the pandemic lockdown has wrecked many lives?
I believe that as long as the person can care for their self and the child and be sure their needs are met, and that the child is loved, then it is okay. However, the adopter needs to fully research and understand things such as Adoption Trauma. It does not matter if you adopt a child the moment it is born or when it is 15 years old, all Adopted children have Adoption Trauma. It is a feeling that they were not wanted by their original family and that they are lucky to be loved by someone else. If you adopt, you must completely change that outlook. A child should not feel lucky they are loved and wanted because that is a basic human want. They should simply feel that they were loved so much that their birth family chose to let them go to someone who they believed could give them a better life.
Also, as an adoptive parent, a person should be prepared to go through all the trauma and emotions with their child and never take things personally when the child feels upset or down based on their trauma. Always work through it with them and maybe even therapy. Basically, just be sure all research and prep is done because adoption is not sunshine and rainbows.
Also, as an adoptive parent, a person should be prepared to go through all the trauma and emotions with their child and never take things personally when the child feels upset or down based on their trauma. Always work through it with them and maybe even therapy. Basically, just be sure all research and prep is done because adoption is not sunshine and rainbows.
This may sound insensitive to people who want a child in such a case, but according to me, I think it's totally wrong and injustice with a child who already has suffered a lot and is alone. Such children need a better life, and only love and emotion can't give such life to these children. Each and every child has the right to have better education so that they can have a bright future, and a jobless man of such age can't provide this.
It is hard to adopt a toddler to your situation nearing retirement but jobless. Usually one of the institution's qualifications for adoption is for you to be financially stable. You need to be financially stable first before you adopt. It depends on your country if they will allow you to adopt even if you are financially unstable. Check first the guidelines if you will get the baby from an institution. If you will adopt directly from a person you still need to be financially stable. Raising a baby these days is not easy until it grows. You need to sustain the baby's needs doctor's check-ups, vitamins, food, and other personal need like clothes and education. You should be prepared once you decide to adopt a toddler.
In this day an era you can't be broke when you are jobless. The internet has a lot of opportunities for everyone so money wount be a problem. My advice, adopt. What you got to lose. That child you want to take care of needs that love and care of a parent. You will love every moment of the experience and both of you will learn a lot from each other.
There are a few things that could happen in a person's life that would make them less likely to be beneficial to adopt a toddler. For example, if the person is in a lower income group, they may be less likely to have a job that can provide a also support a toddler. Additionally, the person may be more likely to experience anxiety and depression if they are jobless and have to worry about what they are doing to support a toddler. It is important to think about what would make a person more likely to become a good supportive parent for their toddler, and making sure that the person they are adopting is healthy and safe is help them as much as it helps the person's self-esteem.