asked in Love+Relationships by (136 points) 1 9 32
During my school days I had some infatuations but I was afraid to say I love you to them. I don't know why. Then all the girls got in love with other boys in my school. Now I am thinking of a love story again. How can I talk to a girl without any fear? I need an expert answer @sil @Nicky @Vilma
replied by (46 points) 1 13 25
Just be yourself and everything follows..

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4 Answers

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answered by VISIONARY (9,060 points) 5 21 52
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In school, you have a lot of peer pressure and it makes a person shy to speak to a girl or a guy. You are afraid of being laughed at or even rejected. This is all part of growing up. Now that you are no longer in school you still have the same fears as before. In order to overcome these fears, it will take time. 

To gain confidence in speaking with a woman you should start off slowly. If you two have the same interest and like the same things this should make it a bit easier to talk with her. You can start off by introducing your self or do like some guys do. You see her sitting there studying, reading, or just watching the sunset, take a seat next to her. Start off by asking her what she is reading. You can say something about that sounds interesting or what is it about. Just make small talk at first. The rest will come as you sit there and chat. The hardest part will be to start the conversation. Even if you really like her and you feel you are in love with her, don't tell her this right away. Go slowly and build up a friendship. You might want to ask her if she'd be interested in having a cup of coffee with you now or another day. Get to know her slowly and build up a friendship. The rest will come naturally as the time passes. 
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answered by Patron (2,963 points) 3 16 41
Hi! Thanks for considering me an expert. I picked this question because it was interesting, and then I saw my name there (even though I never got a notification that you marked me there...so sorry if I am late).

I believe you do not have to be shy to talk to people. I know it is easier said than done, but I am a shy person myself and learned to be outgoing and now am not really afraid of talking to anyone.

It is super cool that you are from korea, I am learning korean actually! I love the food, the language and the culture, would like to go to the country someday! (See , this is one example on how to make talk with a person!) Anyways, back to your question. If you have interest in a person try to start a conversation with something basic, asking out, asking random questions. Saying I love you right away might scare people. In fact you need to better get to know each other first so you really find out if that person interests you! For example, sometimes you admire a person because he or she is attractive on the outside, however the personality of the person might be annoying.

Sometimes we also get into relationships that we think the person will change and be what we think he or she is, but do not waste your time, people never change, we cannot change others, they are the ones who can change themselves.

Now, go ahead and dont be afraid to talk! You can start with small talk>invitation> and then if you think the person was nice you can keep talking to them. A tip is, do not throw on the table that you have a love interest at first, as the person should also get to know you better!

Good luck!
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answered by LEGEND (6,086 points) 3 27 50
I am a girl and I have fears of talking to guys too but I already overcome it. If you want to talk to girls or a specific girl, might as well know her first so that the first trial of talks will not be awkward. I know the feeling of being rejected by a guy because I don't know what I am saying while talking to him. A little hello will not hurt the both of you. Try to have a greeting with a sweet smile. Think a conversation that will not make her bored, like asking about her dress or what she loves to do. The part when you already have some little research about her will lead to a long and good conversation. If a girl find something in common with a certain guy for sure she will stay and talk to you. If you even apply a certain good humor, like saying a joke, sharing some mistakes and you look funny while sharing it, it will lead to something good. Once a girl laugh at your joke it means you are comfortable to be with and for sure another conversation will strike once you see each other. 
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answered by VISIONARY (9,008 points) 7 18 73
I think we always have this problem at a younger age and I had it too and as I grow older I knew it just takes us conquering our fears and facing it head long.

First you just have to build  your self esteem,pick it up and tell yourself you can do it.walk up to the person involve and let out your words,you wouldn't believe how easy it can be,even if you are snubbed don't mind,because it part of building up your self confidence,you need to be brave in the face of tensions or heat.

You could walk away the first time and repeat the circle again and again until you kill the shyness.Remember practice makes perfect so keep working at  it to raise your confidence.

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