asked in Mental Health & Psychology by (191 points) 4
I thought becoming a parent is easy but as time passes by, it isn't.

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9 Answers

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answered by VISIONARY (9,003 points) 6 10 19
I always thought so too until I started having them and I appreciate our parents more now for holding it down with all our mischievous and stubborn behaviour.

From my experience the first thing is to be friends with your kids, I realize that I get more words from them when we are in the playing mood and I get to know what they did previously and what they will be up ,one just have to move ahead of them to stop any activity they have in their little heads that might not be right.

Improve on both relationship and life skills.This will help one to understand the kids better and see things from their own perspective too.

Dump comparing them with others instead develop their innate abilities and help them be unique and creative. That way you will showing smartness.
replied by (191 points) 4
Thanks Jerry, such nice tips from you. My daughter is 4 years old and a bit delayed in speech. At this time, I am doubling my effort and time so that she could catch up. Most of the times, I really think of things if my parenting is really good. Thanks a lot!
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answered by (382 points) 1 1 10

Parenthood is a challenging experience and no two families are ever the same, but research can give you a few pointers on successful parenting strategies. A few highlights:

  1. Avoid praising children based on results; focus on the effort they put in instead. A child who gets praised for being smart all the time, for example, will avoid anything that challenges their intelligence. They end up limiting themselves, since their whole identity was based on figuring things out easily. And when they do experience setbacks, it can be catastrophic for them.
  2. That said, don't give praise too often. If we only work based on rewards, we don't develop the resilience we need to work through frustrating situations without someone else guiding us all the way.
  3. Make sure children get regular and sufficient sleep. Good sleep hygiene is important for everyone, especially children.
  4. Don't lash out when they tell you the truth. Encourage honesty.
  5. Set rules and enforce them consistently, but don't be too strict and restrain their freedom.
replied by (191 points) 4
THANKS Tomah. i have a daughter who is exceptionally different from other kids. Sometimes, I just stop and think if I have done things the right way.
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answered by LEGEND (6,078 points) 2 10 28
To be a smart parent, you just need to provide for your child's welfare. You need to take care of them, give them the best healthy foods, take time and bond with them and just be a parent you should be expected. As they are growing, their brain starts to develop. They got to meet different kinds of people. Once they are asking questions, or talk about anything, you just need to be there to give them the clear answer. Explain them the things that are vague for them in a manner they will always remember. They will start to make mistakes. Explain to them that human beings are prone to making it but the purpose of that is to learn from it and help others to understand it once they had done it too. If your child is well guided, I think that is smart parenting already.
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answered by LEGEND (6,076 points) 6 9 22
I don't think there is a standard way of being a smart parent to a child than living by example. I am of the school of thought that if parents really want to be smart in parenting their children, they must have an exemplary lifestyle worth emulating. Realistically, you can't be a parent and you're not practicing what you are teaching your children. Children tend to learn faster by what their parents are doing.

Unfortunately, present day parents have lost touch in how to be smart in giving proper upbringing to their children. And that's evident in how this children are behaving themselves in the outside world. We now have parents living lives that they wouldn't want their children to live. You'd see some lying, smoking and drinking and committing all manner of unacceptable atrocities in the presence of their children.

On a personal level, I would like to be a smart parent to my children that would inculcate good morals, manners and all kinds of good qualities in them, so that they can be good ambassoadors of my name anywhere they are in life.
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answered by ELITE (4,052 points) 5 13 41
It definitely isn't as easy as we imagine it's going to be.  I think before we have children we have these preconceived ideas of how we are going to bring them up not realising that all children are different and what works for one might not work for another,

I had two children who were so different. One was easy to manage but the other was extremely  difficult and remained that way until this day. I don't think we can ever be fully prepared for the problems we are going to face during parenthood.

All you can do is your best. Love them, care for them, help them through their little problems in life and hope that at the end you will have raised a decent human being, It surely isn't easy but rest assured that you are not the only one and there will be many facing the same or similar problems to you.
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answered by LEGEND (6,006 points) 5 9 19
The easier way to deal with kids is to be their friend and at the same time a parent. You don't have to be their best friend but just have a friendly relationship with them where they can talk to you at all times and not be scared. You also need to take the time to understand them and their individuality. Do not expect what works for one child to be perfect for the other. People differ and it begins from childhood.

Don't spare to correct them always when they are wrong. It is easier to instill discipline in them even as toddlers than when they grow older. You must never forget to remind them of your love by your words and gestures. That is most of all the most important. They should know that whatever you do is out of love and in their best interest.
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answered by ELITE (3,008 points) 2 6 13
Parenthood is never an easy task on every parent want to their children excel in life,.it requires a whole lot of commitment,  creativity,  time and patience.

It is very difficult to knows the challenges in it fully until you upgrade to that stage,  to be  a smart parents to your child simply means you also  want your child to grow up smartly, this also requires you to always appear neat and smart to your child almost all the time.
You need to do a lot of things like inciting their names in good and moral oriented  songs,  enforce discipline as much as possible especially when necessary,  be there friends and always be free to them so that you can easily know their feelings when you need to do,  always fulfill the promises you make to them and never level to them nor to someone in their presence.
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answered by ELITE (3,642 points) 6 8 14
It's a good prevelige to become a parent and the happiness that children bring into our life is priceless. But children aren't that perfect, sometimes they can be hard to handle with or easy as. To become a parent I think there is no formula in it, it will just come naturally as a human. Being there with your children, guide them and protect them and show them love everyday. Acknowledge children when they ask or say something to you.

As a parent myself, it wasn't that easy for me as nobody says it was just easy. nobody told me what should parent will do, it will just come natural to me raisng two boys is harder than I thought, I thought it would be fun for them to be with together and grow up together. But, not all the time so in times of trouble, as  a parent we should guide them through.
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answered ago by Patron (1,888 points) 2 6 15
For sure there is no manual of how to take care of a child, there are new challenges everyday. There are parents who have felt like they are failures in how they bring up their children, because of the way their children have turned out to be. But the truth is we learn something new everyday. I don't think there is a way of being smarter than your children. They can sometimes out smart us when we least expect it. I guess the best thing to do is try to bond with your kids, know what they are about, in short, get involved in your child's life and that way you will know how to deal with them. You will be a step ahead of them, if they try to play tricks on you, you will already be in the know how. When you are not involved in their lives they will take advantage of you not knowing what they do or like.

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